“Crexy” Day O’Horror #2!

Somewhere in Rural America

I like Eric Balfour.  He’s one of those actors who always manages to find work, but not necessarily in the most appealing films and television shows.  Every once in awhile he’ll hit a home run with shows like Haven or 24, but he spends most of his time on the set of films like Dinoshark or Skyline.  In other words, he frequents the SyFy channel…..a lot.  Add Little Dead Rotting Hood to the list of films that Balfour is in, but that I seriously doubt that he remembers to place on his resume.

Balfour heads up a cast that includes Bianca A. Santos (Ouija, The DUFF), Patrick Muldoon (Starship Troopers, Days of Our Lives), Romeo Miller (former child rapper Lil’ Romeo and actor in films like Madea’s Witness Protection and Honey), Heather Tom (The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful) and Amy Argyle (Frank & Lola).

MILD SPOILERS AHEAD!

The movie takes place in a rural town somewhere in Appalachia.  The local wolf population seems to be getting more aggressive in recent days.  When people start to die, Sheriff Adam, Deputy Henry, and the townsfolk go on a wolf hunt.  Danny’s girlfriend, Samantha, goes missing after her grandmother is found dead from an apparent suicide.  Both of these events are tied together, and it’s up to the sheriff, Danny, and Samantha to figure out what’s really going on in the area.  Thankfully, Samantha has become a killing machine on the side of good, and she’s out to stop the top dog in the pack!

This was the first time that I’ve watched this film.  While I’ll probably stumble upon it on SyFy or another network in the future, I doubt that I’ll ever intentionally seek out this movie again.  It’s one of those films that you want to watch just to see how bad it can be.  The good news is that it isn’t terrible.  The bad news is that it’s bad more than it’s good.

With The Asylum producing the film and with Balfour in the cast, you probably already know what to expect from this movie.  A few actors that play their roles straight (Balfour, Santos, and Tom), a few that try entirely too hard in their roles (Miller, Argyle), and that one person who knows exactly what type of film they’re in and proceed to chew the scenery around them and have fun (Muldoon).

Miller is especially tough to watch in this movie.  He tries too hard to convince the viewer that he’s in a dire situation and it comes across in a terrible fashion.  That’s saying something for a movie of this caliber.  Muldoon is hilarious.  He plays up his role for gags and walks away from this film as the real winner.  He’s also the reason for “Crexy” in my title.  You’ll have to watch the film to see why.  Balfour and Tom, professional to the end, give very solid performances in an otherwise forgettable film.  Santos does a pretty good job, but she basically growls and tells people to “Get out of here!” while wearing fingerless gloves and a crop top.  Argyle is pretty much just there.  She’s a ne’er-do-well who apparently controls the local wolf population, but her role lacks bite.

There are also plenty of other nameless characters in the film that serve as fodder for the wolves that roam the countryside.  One of them in particular, Ashley Doris, can be seen visibly smirking while watching “in terror” as her boyfriend gets ripped to shreds by one of the wolves.  Considering the fact that she is sans clothing while all of this is going on shows you just how obvious her smirk was!  Much like Muldoon, I appreciated the fact that Doris realized what type of movie she was in and appeared to be enjoying her brief moment to shine on camera.

Besides Muldoon and Day, there was another treat for eagle-eyed nerds and geeks to find.  At the beginning of the film we witness the suicide of Samantha’s grandmother.  Who plays her grandmother?  None other than the lovely Marina Sirtis (Deanna Troi from Star Trek:  The Next Generation).  Sirtis’ role is basically a cameo, but it was nice to see her on the screen again.  I still have a crush on her.

I also have to admit that I’ve had a crush on Heather Tom for quite some time as well.  Growing up in rural Louisiana meant that summer time TV viewing during the day meant soap operas or educational programming.  I alternated between the two, but tended to watch The Young and the Restless a whole lot more than The Electric Company whenever Tom joined the cast as Victoria.  On that note, Tom’s character in this film is Officer Victoria (an obvious nod to her soapy past).

I will say that the cinematography in this film was excellent.  Exterior shots (around Santa Clarita, CA) looked perfect.  The CGI creatures and transformations were lackluster, but not unexpected.

I suggest watching this film at least once, if for no other reason than to see Balfour and Tom play straight to the goofiness that is Muldoon and the overacting of Miller.  It isn’t terrible, but I doubt that it will win any major awards.

As always, thanks for reading.  If you happen to know Heather Tom, tell her that her summertime crush is no longer available, but he’d love to get a signed photo or phone call from her!!!!!