Thirty-One Days O’Horror: Road Train (2010)

Let’s Ride #21!

Opening with a needless sex scene and then unraveling into a ridiculous mess, 2010’s Road Train (also called Road Kill) is a terrible film. I love bad movies, but this film just plain sucks. It tries very hard to give the viewer a cyclical view of Hades, or something similar, but never really pays off the viewer with a conclusion. The characters, excepting one, are completely unlikeable and the story is ludicrous.

I’m assuming that the sex scene that opens this film is meant to introduce friction between the two couples in the film, but that could have simply been tossed into the story while the gang is barreling down the highway on their getaway in the Outback. Instead, we get to see Bob Morley and Sophie Lowe moan and groan for a bit before the story actually gets moving. Once the four friends are on the road, they are rammed by a road train (for us Americans, think a massive semi-truck pulling more than one trailer) and ultimately end up getting driven off of the highway. As they gather up supplies, they discover that the road train is parked not far from them. They investigate it and soon enough, the driver returns shooting a gun at them. They still the road train and make a dash for safety, but they eventually find themselves at a dead end. Then they begin having hallucinations, visions of Cerberus, the three-headed dog that protects Hades’ gates, and start turning on one another. Oh, and the semi runs on humans, just FYI.

I cannot emphasize enough how terrible this film is. The only character that I actually liked was Nina (Lowe), who is in a relationship with the very, very easy to hate Craig (Morley). Along with them are Craig’s ex-girlfriend, Liz (Georgina Haig), who is now dating Craig’s best friend, Marcus (Xavier Samuel). Let me say that I had no issues with the acting in this film. My issues are strictly with the plot written by Clive Hopkins and the way director Dean Francis patched it all together on the screen.

I do not recommend this film. It’s one of the worst road horror flicks that I’ve watched. I’m all for absurd stories or time loop terror, but this movie is too much of a jumbled, boring mess to waste your time.

Thanks for checking out my review.